How many of us really feel the love every day? Not many. We get so involved with the trivial and mundane tasks that we forget to 'feel' the love that is around us. Having kids takes care of that part, especially when they are as expressive as mine are. Over the last few months, I have observed Chunchu coming up with beautiful expressions of her love for me, and she manages to overwhelm me every single time she does that.
Like one day, she said, "Mamma, mera mann karta hai main kabhi aapse door na jaun...main aapse fevicol se chipak jaun" (I never want to go away from you, I wish I could get stuck with you with fevicol) How did she come up with this statement, I don't understand. But the effect that it had on me was just splendid...I felt so grateful to her, and I was overwhelmed with emotions, all I could manage to say was that I would never go away from her. Of course, I walked around so proudly for a number of days following this incidence and narrated to everyone who was willing to listen!
I myself believe that if you feel anything good about someone, you should always express it, since you probably might never get a second chance and who knows, your few words of love might make a huge difference to someone. Hence, I always keep telling my kids that I love them and that I miss them when I am in office and that they are always on my mind. Perhaps, they have learned to express themselves like that.
Day before yesterday, we were watching 'Deep Impact'. There was this scene where a family is trying to get away to a high land to save themselves from the upcoming flood they know is going to kill them. There is a small child and a grown up daughter in the family. When the mother realizes that she won't be able to make it, she gives her baby to her daughter and asks her to go away with her boyfriend. Now, Chunchu asked me why did the mother give up her baby. I explained to her the situation that the mother was trying to save her child. Chunchu says, "Mamma, even if the child would die, at least she would die with her mom."
I explained again, "But baby, a mother should always try to save her child at any cost, and should think about her child's welfare even if that means she has to give up the child."
Chunchu then says something that will always be fresh in my mind. She said, "Mamma, I don't want to die, but if you know you are going to die, please do not give me away to anyone; let me die with you."
I tried to reason with her telling her that she should not think about such things and that I am not going to die, but she insisted I promise her that I would let her die with me. I was so touched by her feelings...after all, who gets to hear from someone an expression of the love that they are ready to shower upon you not only in life, but also in death? How many people know of someone in their lives who can really think of dying with them? I do, now!
There have been several such moments when Chunchu has made me forget all that is painful in life, all that is ugly and all that is not what I would want it to be. She makes me feel grateful for the fact that I feel so loved as I have never felt before.
Shiku, on the other hand, is not so expressive with words, but as they say, actions speak louder than words. The little gestures that he shows every day like demanding to drink water from my bottle, demanding to get his teeth brushed and take a bath only from me on weekends, insisting I let him sit in my lap whenever he gets a chance, asking his sister to keep quiet when he is talking to me (he actually says, "Didi, chup ho jao!"). The small things that he does - the way he kisses me goodbye even in sleep, just at the prompt of "Shiku, bye-bye kissi", the way he proudly declares to be the best son in the world, the way he teases me for little things like my handbag...those endless expressions of his feelings for me make me swell with joy and pride!
While Chunchu keeps telling me how she thinks that I am the best mom in the world, Shiku keeps showing me that I am probably being a good mother (if not the best). But sometimes, Shiku behaves like a typical guy. Like, the other day, he said to Chunchu, "your mom is not good" and they actually had a fight about that! And when Chunchu told me about it I explained to her that since I am Shiku's mom also, he is implying that his mom is not good. As soon as Shiku heard that he said, "Mamma, you are good, I was just kidding, it wasn't for real." I couldn't help smiling :-)
Rabindranath Tagore said - "Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man." I think every child comes with the message that God still loves you, and since He cannot show it every day, He sends a child into your life to do that!
Love you, Chunchu and Shiku!
